How To Get Over A Breakup For Men
That deep painful feeling in your chest. The tightening sensation that you get as you begin to realize you’ve lost your girlfriend. Perhaps she was more than that, a great friend to you as well. Perhaps you hated each others guts by the end but no matter what it still is unlikely to be painless.
The first thing I would say about getting over a breakup is that I know that it can feel like the world has ended. But don’t buy into that. The sun will rise again. Each day you will feel just a little bit better.
The next point I would make it take care of yourself. If you’ve been in this relationship and it has caused you your health, fitness and get ripped campaign to stop. That is the first thing I would start with. The physical, emotional and mental well being of yourself is of vital importance. If you are feeling down because of the breakup you have to make sure physically you are fueling yourself with the best nutrition you can and getting yourself into good physical shape. This will reinforce the initial stages of the chance positively. If you eat shit, don’t workout. You’ll feel 10x worse.
There is something I would do even before hitting the gym.
Get everything on your phone, computer, apartment that reminds you of her.
Store it away.
Put it out of sight in a place that you’ll never see it again. You can delete it but someday you might want to look back at it and realize that although your relationship is not continuing that you had some good times anyway.
The next practical step I can give you to deal with this breakup is. Talk to your friends and family about it. Be open. Express your inner emotional chimp. Do not supress the emotion that you feel no matter what it is. This will only come back to bite you in the future. Rage if necessary. Cry yourself to sleep if you want to. That’s ok and normal. Don’t let anyone tell you to put a brave face on it. Particularly if this was a relationship that lasted a long time.
You can dedicate some set period of time to grieving the relationship and the end of it. It’ll vary depending on how long the relationship was but lets say you were together for a year and you lived together. Something like 3 weeks to get out all that nasty charged energy. Cry. Be angry. Shout. Scream. Moan to your friends that you’ll never find anyone like her again. But once you hit that 3 week date it’s time to move onto the next phase of recovery.
Time to move on my friend.
Get back out there on the dating scene. Start that hobby you’ve always wanted. Pick up a back pack and travel. Reconnect with your friends that you’ve lost contact with. Make sure you’re sleeping well too thats important. As mentioned previously, pick up those weights and get moving. Now is the time to take all that residual energy that you have left and instead of feeling sorry for yourself and being introspective about what could or should have happened. Get out there and take life by the horns!
The final piece of getting over a breakup would be self reflection. You’ll know when you are here because you can look back at the relationship with a cheeky smile about the good times and the bad. You realise that you were not quite right for each other but you can remember the phenemonel time you spent together and understand it was an important part of your growth.
This is valuable because it will allow you to understand what you want your future relationships to look like, what kind of girl you will be compatible with over the long term and anything you need to work on for your relationships in the future to last. It is vital you do this, but only after you can look back with 100% clarity without any emotions tied to the events that lead to the eventual breakdown of your relationship.
I hope this article has helped highlight the potential for growth even if you’re going through dark times right now.
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